Mixology Monday: Rum

The theme of this month’s Mixology Monday, hosted by Trader Tiki, is rum. Last month, for the fruit liqueur-themed Mixology Monday, Felicia made (and drank) a Banana Split Martini. Here’s the real deal: Felicia has to admit she hates making cocktails with fruit liqueurs. When mixing cocktails, Felicia prefers to use fresh, creative ingredients, not artificially flavored yellow dye number two. As a matter of fact, Felicia has become well-known for her Farmers’ Market Cocktails and other such labor intensive locavore drinks. Felicia would like to tell you that as much as you might love it, forget the Banana Split Martini. She was drunk when she made it. You deserve even better.

In the spirit of freshness, Felicia would like to introduce you to her latest creation: the Bananas Foster Martini. This martini has received a “two thumbs up” and a “bottoms up” from the staff at both Simply Red Bistro and Felicia’s Atomic Lounge. This cocktail is a bit of work, so you might want to order it at the Lounge or Bistro instead of making it yourself. If you decide to use this cocktail on your own restaurant/bar menu, be sure to give Felicia credit because this extraordinarily tasty winner is going into the Felicia Cocktail Book, due to be finished this summer (any thirsty publishers out there?).

The Bananas Foster martini is essentially the best Bananas Foster you have ever had, in liquid form. This cocktail is super fresh and dangerously smooth. Another successful dessert in a glass by yours truly.

Felicia’s Bananas Foster Martini
½ medium-sized banana
1 ½ ounce Goslings dark rum
1 ¼ ounce cinnamon spice syrup (see recipe below)
¾ ounce half-n-half
whipped cream
cinnamon

Muddle banana with rum, syrup and half-n-half until it is smoothie consistency (no lumps). Shake with ice. Strain into chilled martini glass. Garnish with whipped cream and a dash of cinnamon.

Cinnamon Spice Syrup
½ cup water
½ cup dark brown sugar
½ vanilla bean
1 cinnamon stick

Cook all ingredients over medium heat, stirring until sugar dissolves. Bring almost to a boil and remove from heat immediately. Cover and let sit for 20 minutes. Remove vanilla bean and cinnamon stick. Let syrup cool before using. This syrup also makes a phenomenal vanilla ice cream topping, especially if you include a few slices of banana.

Your Anise Cocktail

Felicia made another new cocktail and the critics (that would be you all) are declaring it fabulous. Felicia concocted a red wine-based simple syrup with star anise and some other spices; a splash of this syrup is then added to a glass of champagne. Felicia was going to call this drink “Red Anise Champagne” but for some reason that name seemed to bring up graphic images for some people. So for those of you have difficulty saying the word “anise,” Felicia has dubbed this drink “Star-Struck Bubbly.” If you tend to cringe at the flavor of licorice, fear not. The anise subtly harmonizes with vanilla bean and cinnamon to create a unique – and incredible - experience for your palate. Seriously, a little anise never hurt anyone.

Sirens and Mojitos

Felicia had her first visit from the flashing lights last night on her busiest night of the year to date. The red, white and blue lights artfully reflected off of the silver walls, creating an air of anticipation and mystery. If Felicia wasn't outside greeting the brave men in uniforms, she would have taken some nice photos of the reflections for you. No, it was not the police coming to arrest Leah who slapped a patron after one too many rude demands for drinks, money waving, etc. Nor was the newly painted men's room on fire after a mischievous patron snuck an indoor cigarette and carelessly tossed the butt into the paper towel-filled trashcan (from the few men who DO wash their hands). The story goes that a patron came upon the unfortunate circumstance of "falling ill" in the bar. What kind of illness? Though Felicia is sensitive and highly intuitive, she is not psychic and does not want to hazard a guess. Hopefully the individual involved will visit us and let us know that she is feeling better. Felicia did learn a few things from the experience that she would like to share with you:

1) a gurney/stretcher does in fact fit through that narrow space between the bar stools and the middle bar.

2) when going out for an evening on the town, you should make sure the people you are with know your last name (and your first name, for that matter).

3) if you are prone to "falling ill," you should pin your full name and address inside your tshirt before you go out. Or use a sharpy and those scratchy iron-on labels like your mom stuck in all your clothes when you went to summer camp.

4) the Ithaca police and Bangs ambulance dudes are really nice. Thanks, guys!

Felicia could go on, but out of respect for the privacy and potential embarrassment of the person who had the pleasure of riding all tucked in and cozy to the hospital with three handsome hunks attending to her needs, Felicia will pause and let you humbly ponder your own embarrassing bar moments.

And now here is the mojito recipe that Felicia promised you:

Mojito

1 ½ ounces rum
about 15 medium-sized mint leaves
½ lime cut into wedges
1 teaspoon sugar
club soda

Muddle rum, mint, limes and sugar in a pint glass (Felicia likes big drinks) until they are thoroughly mashed. Fill with ice; top with club soda. Toss into another glass and back again to gently mix.

The Mighty Mojito

The Mojito is back! After a long, long winter, the alley is open and the mojito is here. It's about time. Everybody has been ordering mojitos. What is a mojito, you ask? Only the most popular summer cocktail in town: rum, limes, sugar, mint and club soda. Felicia will post a recipe later. For now, you get to watch Felicia get big shipments of limes, observe the growth of the staff''s popeye muddling muscles and hear Leah's curses as she unclogs drains filled with mint leaves (no matter how hard Felicia tries, she can't seem to keep that mint out of the drains). Behold the Mighty Mojito!

Mixology Monday: Fruit Liqueurs

Another Mixology Monday has snuck up on Felicia. Bam! This month’s topic is fruit liqueur and the roundup is hosted at Morsels and Musings. Leave it to Felicia to come up with a fruity-creamy-dessert martini. (Must… have… dessert….) To Mr. Anonymous Comment Leaver, perhaps this cocktail will be just another “sickly sweet” drink. The moral of the story for Mr. Anonymous and all you doubters out there is: Don’t knock it til you drunk it!

But Felicia digresses. For those of us who like sweet creamy cocktails, the Banana Split Martini is simply scrumptious. It has a universal appeal to dessert-lovers and especially to girly girls who like frou-frou drinks. In a nutshell, the Banana Split Martini tastes remarkably like the vanillaicecream-hotfudge-strawberrysauce-bananagoo melt left at the bottom of your banana split when you have finished eating it.

Try it. Or make your friends try it if you are scared. And then let Felicia know what you think. Don’t be afraid to sign your name. Felicia is quite lady-like, and she swears she does not bite (except upon request).

Banana Split Martini

1 ounce Stoli Vanil vodka
¼ ounce strawberry liqueur
½ ounce banana liqueur
generous squirt of chocolate sauce
splash of cream

Shake all ingredients vigorously with ice. Strain into chilled martini glass. Garnish with whipped cream, chocolate sauce and a cherry.

Sound Domestic Advice

During an online search for cocktail recipes from yesteryear, Felicia came about some domestic advice from the wise and socially graced Mary Randolph, who wrote The Virginia Housewife in 1860. Being a thoughtful and domesticated woman herself, Felicia felt compelled to pass some of Mary’s good advice on to you: “Early rising is essential to the good government of a family. A late breakfast deranges the whole business of the day and throws a portion of it on the next, which opens the door for confusion to enter. No work can be done till breakfast is finished. The grand arcanum of management lies in three simple rules: Let every thing be done at a proper time, keep every thing in its proper place, and put every thing to its proper use.” Felicia couldn’t have said it better herself. Mary continues with some lovely recipes, including ice cream, fruitcake and mock turtle soup of calf’s head. Alas, no tonics, bitters or cocktails. Felicia, as always, shall keep up her search. And since it is well after noontime, perhaps Felicia better have a little breakfast.

Grand Coffee

It is a well-known fact that consuming alcohol can make you feel relaxed and at times sleepy. If you are at a high-energy cocktail party, the excitement of dancing or standing around talking and laughing with friends can keep you stimulated and alert despite any alcohol in your system. But sit at a table with your mellow acquaintances after a huge meal and a heavy dessert, with boring classical music playing on the stereo, and you are likely going to feel ready for a big fat nap. To maintain energy when drinking alcohol, some people will mix their liquor of choice with a caffeinated beverage. Common combinations are rum with Coke or vodka with Red Bull.

Uggh. Red bull. Not to mention Felicia's rum-and-coke-experience when she was 14 years old. Felicia would like to encourage you to try something a little more classy. The next time you are looking for an after-dinner drink and you fear a nip of bourbon will bring on the zzzzz’s, try turning your coffee into a cocktail. Popular coffee additions include Baileys, Kahlua, Jameson and chocolate liqueur. Felicia’s favorite booze to add to coffee is Grand Marnier, an orange liqueur. A little G. M. and a twist of orange peel will make your coffee taste like a heavenly treat, give you a balanced dose of pep and relaxation and keep that dinner party lively.

Grand Coffee

6 ounces coffee
1 ounce Grand Marnier
cream and sugar (optional)
orange twist

Pour 1 ounce of Grand Marnier in coffee mug. Add coffee, plus cream and sugar to taste. Garnish with orange twist, or homemade candied orange peel if you happen to have some in your pantry like Felicia.

Drink wisely, Grasshopper...

The Grasshopper (in Kung Fu movies) refers to an inexperienced person who has much to learn. The Grasshopper (the bug) represents wisdom, nobility and taking leaps of faith without knowing where you will land. The Grasshopper (the cocktail) derives its name from its bright green color similar to that of the bug. Put all these definitions together and you have a smart green chocolate-mint concoction that makes a satisfying after-dinner drink and opens your mind to learning from whatever experiences the world throws at you.

Helpful Hint: Add a squirt of chocolate syrup and use dark crème de cacao with clear crème de menthe, and you can call this cocktail a Dirty Girl Scout or a Peppermint Patty.

Another Helpful Hint: When called a Dirty Girl Scout, this drink makes a popular shot for 20-somethings.

Still another Helpful Hint: If you do not like mint chocolate chip ice cream, this beverage is definitely not for you.

In the paraphrased words of Master Po, go now, Grasshopper, and guard above all things the purity of your cocktail.

Grasshopper

¾ once white (clear) crème de cacao
¾ ounce of green crème de menthe
splash of cream or soy milk

Shake all ingredients with ice. Strain into chilled martini glass.

What's In Your Basket?

Sometimes it is all about the garnish. You can make a great drink, but people will think it tastes even better if it looks attractive. Visiting your parents for Easter? When you make dad his gin and tonic, toss in some jellybeans or perch a yellow peep on the side to make it festive.

If you are feeling more adventurous, the Lemontini is an inspirational cocktail for celebrating the coming of Spring. It is not quite time for flip-flops yet (though that will not deter some people from wearing them prematurely and freezing their toes), but it is about time to make yourself a tart and refreshing cocktail. All the signs of Spring are here: the birds are singing, the squirrels are getting frisky, the street sweeper is hard at work in the middle of the night (made possible by the annoying odd/even parking rules), the crocuses are poking their colorful heads out of the ground and you, well, you are wicked antsy for some warm sunny weather after another long cold Ithaca winter. Turn the heat up in the house, put on your favorite pair of shorts and a tank top, and invite your friends over for a Spring-expediting Lemontini. And don’t forget the garnish.

Lemontini

1 ½ ounces citrus vodka
2 T lemon juice
1 T simple syrup (half sugar, half water)
lemon-lime soda
Yellow Marshmallow Peep

Shake citrus vodka, lemon juice and simple syrup with ice. Strain into a martini glass. Add a big splash of lemon-lime soda. Garnish with Yellow Peep. Special thanks to Felicia Margot for creating this Spring-is-coming cocktail.

Mixology Mondays: Limit One, Please

This month's Mixology Monday is hosted by Rick at Kaiser Penguin. The theme is alcoholic beverages with so much alcohol that patrons are limited to one at some establishments. For the record, Felicia is a lush AND a lightweight. She stays far, far away from super-large drinks so she can stay far, far away from the porcelain god. Felicia does, however, like her drinks super-strong, with no mixers. One of Felicia's favorite no-mixer bevvys is the caipirinha. This Brazilian cocktail is potent yet refreshing, thanks to all the limes. One makes Felicia tipsy, two makes her drunk and three, well, Felicia doesn't remember what three does, but she's sure it's great.

Caipirinha

2 ounces cachaca
1 tsp sugar
1 lime cut into wedges

Muddle lime wedges and sugar in a double rocks glass. Fill glass with ice. Add cachaca. Drink. Get loopy.

St. Patrick's Day

A plethora of boisterous activities and traditions are associated with St. Patrick’s Day: green beer, a shamrock painted on one’s cheek, Irish car bombs (the drink), green clothing, Guinness, public drunkenness, and the cult-like hunt for the Shamrock Shake (which incidentally is available at the Ithaca McDonald’s). Since St. Patty’s is on a Monday this year, the Lounge is closed so you’ll find Felicia avoiding the drunken barhopper shenanigans and sitting at home by the fire with her favorite Irish drink, Jameson and Ginger with a couple of dashes of bitters. Felicia met this swell couple and their bitters sidekick three years ago at a Jameson tasting and subsequently introduced them to all of her friends. They were a hit and have been the talk of the town ever since. The tough whiskey edge of the Jamo gets softened by the sweet ginger ale, and the bitters add some character and depth. Better than a Shamrock Shake? If you run into Uncle O’ Grimacey, offer him one of these Irish cocktails and see what he thinks.

Bitter James and Ginger

1 ½ ounces Jameson
2 dashes of bitters
ginger ale

Fill a rocks glass with ice. Add Jameson and bitters. Top with ginger ale. Kiss the Blarney Stone.

Old Fashioned

Felicia loves her fancy drinks, but when Felicia is feeling nostalgic, she always returns to the classics like martinis, manhattans and old fashioneds. Nowadays, classic cocktails are not just for the ol’ geezers. Drinking them is considered cool, in a retro kind of way. The classics also weed out the bar hoppers from the serious cocktail aficionados.

If your childhood was anything like Felicia’s, you grew up on the whiskey-soaked cherries from the bottom of your dad’s and grand-dad’s old fashioneds. The recipe below is one common version of this timeless cocktail.

Old Fashioned

1 ½ ounce bourbon
2 dashes Angostura bitters
1 tsp sugar
orange slice
maraschino cherry
club soda (optional)

Muddle bourbon, bitters, orange and cherry in a rocks glass. Add ice. Add club soda to taste.

The Party Dress

First, it must be explained that as the sun goes down and night falls, when Felicia lays her head on the pillow and drifts off to dreamland, she has some very, very strange dreams. Last night, Felicia dreamt she was hosting a lively cocktail party where she concocted an incredible drink made with gin, cucumbers and orange juice. The cucumber-orange elixir then turned into a tangerine-colored frilly party dress adorned with pale green ribbons. The guests loved the cocktail, and Felicia’s new fancy dress was the envy of everyone at the party.

Upon waking, Felicia described the bewitched drink to friends who scoffed, telling her the dream was weird and the ingredients in the drink even weirder. Still enchanted by her lingering dream-state, Felicia began to obsessively experiment to recreate the magical cocktail and prove to her friends that dreams really do come true. And she succeeded: this cocktail, strange though it may sound, tastes exquisite, and, well, dreamy…

The Party Dress

1 ½ ounce gin
1 ½ ounce orange juice
½ ounce soda water
½ ounce cucumber puree (peel before pureeing)
cucumber slice

Fill shaker with ice. Add gin, orange juice and cucumber puree. Swirl mixture in shaker until outside of shaker gets frosty. Strain into martini glass. Top with soda water. Garnish with cucumber slice. Allow magical things to happen.

Black Heart Guinness

Dear Felicia,

What should we do, Felicia? We want to be burly. We want to be gruff. We want to be manly. But we secretly love foo-foo drinks. How can we maintain our masculine images with pink drinks in our calloused hands?

Signed,
Misunderstood Burly Men

Dear Misunderstood B.M.,

Felicia feels your pain. The pressures on men today are enormous. If you do not drink cheap beer, you risk being judged harshly by your peers. Fear not, oh-rough-and-tumble-yet-secretly-sensitive men. Felicia has a solution for you. The Black Heart Guinness puts hair on your chest, looks good in a dirty hand, and fools everyone who would not suspect the added chocolate liqueur and cherry juice. Your vulnerability will be our little secret.

Black Heart Guinness

10 ounces Guinness
1 ounce crème de cacao
¼ ounce maraschino cherry juice
maraschino cherry

Pour crème de cacao and cherry juice into pilsner glass. Top with Guinness. Add cherry as garnish, unless you are trying to maintain rugged image. Special thanks to Felicia Sharon for creating this man-meets-kitten cocktail.

Vanilla Vodka

Most people stock some version of the basics in their home bar: vodka, gin, tequila, rum, bourbon and scotch. Who wants to buy some obscure liquor used in a random cocktail recipe found in some newspaper column or online, only to use the liquor once and then have the bottle sit on the shelf getting dusty? Felicia knows you like to spend your money wisely. So if you are going to buy one bottle of liquor this month, you should buy Stolichnaya Vanil vodka. Of all the flavored vanilla vodkas on the market, this one is least likely to taste like you bought it at Yankee Candle Company.

Stoli Vanil is versatile. It is light and pleasantly reminiscent of vanilla extract. For a tart, refreshing cocktail that tastes like key lime pie, mix it with sweetened lime juice and lemon-lime soda. For a special treat, you can substitute Stoli Vanil for regular vodka in your white Russian. For a rich dessert-in-a-glass drink, add it to chocolate milk or hot chocolate. Drink it with club soda with a twist of lime if you are watching calories. And for those of you who do not keep much in your house besides junk food and soda pop, Stoli Vanil tastes great with coca-cola.

The recipe below tastes surprisingly like cream soda. No fancy ingredients required; all you have to do is run to the nearest convenience store for some ginger ale if you do not already have some in your fridge. Make a single drink for yourself, or make a giant amount in a big glass bowl with some orange sherbet floating in it and you have got yourself a tasty party punch for a pile of friends.

Grownup Cream Soda

1 ½ ounce Stoli Vanil
ginger ale
cherry

Fill rocks glass with ice. Add Stoli Vanil. Top with ginger ale and garnish with cherry.

Reuse and Recycle

Felicia believes in reusing, recycling, composting, and anything else that is going to help save our planet earth. Now, thanks to Felicia Fred, there is a creative way to reuse all those Bookers boxes. Just remember, you saw it here first.

Felicia's Practical Tips for Not Getting Sick

Hey kids, it’s flu season! Felicia has been hearing horror stories about some of the illnesses that have been flying around town, including references to the “super flu” and the “death flu.” Here are Felicia’s conscientious practical tips to avoid getting sick:

1. Don’t share your chapstick (didn’t your mother warn you about this one? what, you want herpes? gheesh.)
2. Don’t wipe your nose on the palm of your hand.
3. Don’t hang out with people who wipe their noses on the palms of their hands.
4. Get your flu shot. It’s not too late.
5. Hide in your house and don’t touch anyone or anything, ever.

OK, that last one is overkill. It is also overkill to put hand sanitizer on your eyebrows (no joke, Felicia saw a waiter do this at Dinosaur BBQ yesterday). The good news: alcohol kills germs. So have yourself a hot toddy or two or three, wash your hands a lot, take your vitamin C and pray to the goddess of cocktails that you are saved from all evil infectious diseases forever more.

Overheard at the bar on Saturday: “Felicia gives good lime.”

Be Felicia's Valentine

Felicia is all about the LOVE and the CHOCOLATE and the BOOZE on Valentine’s Day. Whether you are smoochy-lovey-dovey with your sweetie or cranky-grumpy-whiny and sworn off dating, Felicia’s is the place to be on February 14. Rumor has it that all the hot couples AND all the hot singles will be at Felicia’s that night. Come before dinner, for dinner or after dinner. Here’s a small sample of the chocolaty treats Felicia is making for Thursday (no paralyzing snowstorm like last year): German Chocolate Martinis, Raspberry Truffle Martinis, Espresso Chocolate Martinis, hot fudge brownie sundaes, chocolate brandy alexander pie, chocolate-dipped strawberries, and more. Pamper yourself, spoil your sweetie, and be Felicia’s Valentine.

Love Potion

How do you feel about Valentine’s Day? Are you a sappy romantic who plans to wine-and-dine your sweetie at an expensive restaurant, buy a dozen red roses and support the multi-million dollar Hallmark Corporation? Or do you buckle under the pressure of it all and at the last minute end up with the $3.99 florist special from the convenience store and a heart-shaped sampler box of gritty Whitman’s chocolate that will end up half-eaten, with just a teeny bite taken out of each piece to find the caramel but avoid the fake crisco-like maple or strawberry cream fillings? Perhaps you absolutely despise Valentine’s Day, because the only card you ever get is from your mother and it is the same one she sent you last year. If one more friend asks you about your V-Day plans, are you convinced you will explode all over them?

Fret no longer and drink this magical elixir. There is nothing like a little love potion to keep your heart company and get you through Valentine’s Day.

Love Potion

¾ ounce Amaretto Disaronno
¾ ounce light rum
5 strawberries
¾ ounce cream or milk

Fill hurricane glass or other fancy-shaped glass with ice. Add all ingredients except one strawberry. Pour entire contents into blender and blend until smooth. Return Love Potion to glass and garnish with remaining strawberry. Be Felicia’s Valentine and drink the Love.

Mixology Mondays: The Countrypolitan

If your childhood was anything like Felicia’s, you grew up on the whiskey-soaked cherries from the bottom of your father’s old-fashioneds and the vodka-enhanced olives from your mother’s dirty martinis. Oh, those were the days. Felicia loves the classic drinks (read: the ones that old people drink) but she likes to put a twist on them to launch them into our modern-day palates. The topic of this month's Mixology Monday is "variations on classic cocktails."

What can brown do for you? Bourbon can help men sprout hair on their chests and give women the courage to use a chainsaw. It can toughen you up and start a fire in your soul. If you don’t want to give up your foo-foo drinks, the Countrypolitan just might be the cocktail for you. The Countrypolitan, a creative take on the standard cosmopolitan, can act as a tame introduction to bourbon for the weak, add pizzazz to that same old whiskey that you’ve been drinking on the rocks every night for years, or dress up your favorite spirit to impress that hot babe you just invited over to your shabby pad. The Countrypolitan gives you the best of both worlds. The city mouse and the country mouse collide with cocktails in their hands. The Wild Wild West meets Sex in the City. A timber wolf and a poodle make sweet love to each other.

Countrypolitan

1.5 ounces of Woodford Reserve bourbon
½ ounce of Cointreau
½ ounce of sweetened lime juice
1 ounce of Cranberry juice
lime wheel

Shake with ice and strain into a chilled martini glass. Garnish with a lime wheel.

Today's Mixology Monday is being hosted by Jimmy's Cocktail Hour. To learn more about Mixology Mondays, check out The Cocktail Chronicles.

Groove Woodworking

Leah finally has a spiffy online woodworking portfolio! You can check it out at:


www.groovewoodworking.com

Gin Facials, Fungal Toes and Mullet Cafes

Vote today! Remember Felicia’s motto: you can’t complain if you don’t vote (a.k.a vote or shut your pie hole).

Another hard day at work: Felicia just wasted an entire afternoon playing on the internet making anagrams. She discovered that some of the creative anagrams for “Felicia’s Atomic Lounge” include:

Gin Facial Outcomes Lie
Single Loco Mafia Cutie
I Ice Mi Cola Fungal Toes
Cocaine Ills Tofu Image
I Go In Mullet Cafes. Ciao!

You, too, can throw away your day searching for anagrams for your name at www.wordsmith.org/anagram. Those of you at work right now, keep an eye over your shoulder for the bossy boss in case you have to quickly change your computer screen. And don’t blame Felicia if your day is unproductive! At least you are having some fun.

The Red Planet

Many people who are curious about Campari take their first sip from a friend’s drink, and follow it with displeased facial contortions and the incredulous remark, “How can anyone drink that stuff?” Any seasoned mixologist will respond that Campari is an acquired taste, a true roller coaster ride for your palate.

What exactly is Campari? It is a bitter Italian aperitif created in 1860 by, no surprise, Mr. Campari. It is comprised of a mysterious mixture of herbs steeped in alcoholic spirits. Some known ingredients include quinine, rhubarb, pomegranate, ginseng, bergamot oil, orange peel, cascarilla bark, and a red dye made from – eek – bugs. It sounds a little scary, yet this classic beverage has been adopted in American culture as a sexy drink.

There are lots of ways to drink Campari, Campari and soda being the most common. The ever-sexy James Bond has embraced both Negronis (Campari, gin, sweet vermouth) and Americanos (Campari, sweet vermouth, soda). In Japan, Campari is served with pineapple juice and grenadine. Campari has even been used as an ingredient in sorbet.

Felicia has concocted a slightly sweet Campari cocktail that teases you with a variety of subtle flavors. From the aroma to the first sip to the surprising finish, this cocktail will delight you with its complexity and leave you feeling sexy.

Red Planet

1 ounce Campari
¾ ounce Grand Marnier
1 ounce fresh squeezed grapefruit juice
club soda
orange wheel

Fill a rocks glass with ice. Add Campari, Grand Marnier and grapefruit juice. Top with soda. Garnish with orange wheel.

The Sazerac

In the spirit of Mardi Gras, Felicia cannot resist writing about one of the most famous New Orleans-based cocktails: the Sazerac. Sazerac drinkers are fussy, which is probably one of the reasons that one rarely finds the Sazerac on a cocktail menu outside of Louisiana. The tradition of the Sazerac goes back a long way, to the times of apothecaries and absinthe. The making of this drink is quite specific and almost ritualistic; you will be shamed by most mixologists if you suggest substitutions to the required ingredients and techniques. Stray not from these instructions, and with only one sip you will feel like you are gaily parading the streets of New Orleans.

So put on your Mardi Gras beads, make yourself a Sazerac, throw doubloons out your window at passersby and try not to lose your shirt. As Stephen Sondheim wrote (possibly about Felicia?): “She has a weakness for Sazerac Slings…”

The Sazerac

¼ ounce Pernod
2 ounces Old Overholt rye whiskey
3 dashes Peychaud or Angostura bitters
¼ oz simple syrup (equal parts sugar and water) or 1 tsp sugar
lemon twist with white pith removed

1. Fill an old fashioned glass with ice so it can chill.
2. Fill a shaker halfway with ice and add whiskey, bitters and simple syrup. Do not shake; instead swirl the liquid around in the shaker until the shaker is frosted on the outside.
3. Discard the ice from the old fashioned glass. Pour Pernod into the old fashioned glass and swirl it around, tilting the glass, coating the sides and bottom of the glass. Discard excess Pernod.
4. Strain the contents of the shaker into the Pernod-coated old fashioned glass.
5. Twist the lemon peel over the drink and rub around rim, and then discard lemon peel.
6. Drink and enjoy.

Women Rule

Felicia attended a luncheon today for Women Ties, a regional women entrepreneur networking group. Wow, is Felicia's response to the event, great big wow. What a bunch of powerhouses. Felicia absolutely loves being in a room packed with really smart women. We're talking all kinds of really smart women. A woman who started her own skin care line, a life coach, a spa owner, a therapist, a restaurant owner, a woodworker, a matchmaker, a clothing designer, a pastry chef, a graphic designer, a boutique owner, a massage therapist, a financial advisor, a realtor, a web designer and on and on. It would have been a great place to have an emotional crisis, a muscle spasm, a sugar craving and dry skin, all at the same time. The speaker today confirmed Felicia's suspicion that smart, entrepreneurial-minded women are pretty much all overachievers. What do you think of having a monthly Overachievers Cocktail Hour at Felicia's? It could be a time for women to come together to share visions, bounce ideas off each other and try to relax a little while sipping a well-deserved cocktail. But we won't relax too much, because a woman's work is never done.

Buy from women! For a list of local women-owned businesses, go to www.womenties.com.

Skinny Monday

skinny [skin-ee] noun. 1: accurate information; facts; 2: news, esp. if confidential; gossip: (Get the skinny on Felicia's Skinny Monday party on February 4th).

What is Skinny Monday? Technically, it is Fat Monday, the day before Fat Tuesday, aka Mardi Gras, but, well, Felicia is a rebel. Though normally closed on Mondays, Felicia’s will be open on MONDAY FEBRUARY 4th from 5pm-8pm ONLY, with entertainment by local Cajun band the BAYOU ROAD KREWE (Steve Selin, Jason Zorn, Joe Damiano, Susie Mills, and the hottest triangle player in town: Ellyn Sellers-Selin). Enjoy drink specials such as the cajun bloody mary, planters punch and Felicia’s sazerac. All the Felicia staff will be in drag! If you saw Guy last year dressed as Anna Nicole Smith (god rest her soul), you will definitely want to come back this year to see if he can outdo himself. Patrons are encouraged to dress in drag, too, if they feel so inspired. At 8pm, the doors lock and we parade to Maxies to eat and keep on partying. Look: it’s a Monday night. You know you don’t have any other plans after work (unless you are planning to attend the Lundi Gras Geek Dinner in Hattisburg, Mississippi which Felicia doubts). So get the skinny at Felicia’s! No cover.

p.s. Your favorite furry lounge mascot (no, it’s Eesah, not Patrick) is blogging and posting bulletin surveys again. www.myspace.com/eesahdog

Raspberry Truffle Martini

It has been another one of those days: the car would not start, the cat pooped on the rug, the hot water heater stopped kicked the bucket, your favorite TV show failed to record and it is snowing again. You are faced with a tortuous decision: do you need chocolate or do you need a martini? Hmmm…chocolate or martini…martini or chocolate….Felicia says, why not have both? A little vodka to calm the nerves, some chocolate to invoke feelings of happiness and coffee liqueur to add a caffeine-induced sense of indestructibility. A hint of raspberry gives you a sense of indulgence, reminding you that you deserve this special treat. Obviously neither your car nor that cat poop are going anywhere, so put on your fuzzy slippers, prop your feet up and relax for a bit as you savor this scrumptious cocktail.

Raspberry Truffle Martini

¾ ounce vodka
¾ ounce coffee liqueur such as Starbucks or Kahlua
½ ounce Chambord
splash of half-and-half
chocolate syrup
whipped cream

Shake all ingredients with ice, including one hearty squirt of chocolate syrup. Strain into a chilled martini glass that you have decorated with chocolate syrup. Garnish with whipped cream and a fancy drizzle of chocolate sauce.

The Rumors Are True

Yes, OK, the gossip is true. Felicia is writing a book. At least, she would be writing a book if she were not avoiding it. Who has time to write when there are martinis that need to be drinken/drank/drunk? Many of you have asked what, pray tell, will be in this mysterious Felicia book. First and most obvious, the book will contain cocktail recipes. No, Felicia is not worried about someone stealing her secrets and making the cocktails at home. Fact is, Felicia knows you are too lazy to do that. You would much rather go out and indulge in the entire lounge experience. Who wouldn't? The book will also contain your favorite Felicia stories, including "The Mystery of the Poison Ivy", "Felicia's Ethics Quiz" and "Conversations with Satan." When will the book be finished? Oy, the pressure! Felicia can't take it. She needs another drink. Good things take time and patience is a virtue and blah blah blah. Felicia met with her fearless crew of book advisors earlier this month who enjoyed some cocktails while they ripped apart Felicia's work to date. Such are the welcome tortures of a soon-to-be best selling author. Perfection hurts, like high heels and face lifts. No, Felicia does not have a publisher yet. She is whoring herself out in case there are any interested publishing Johns reading this. Felicia love you long time. Now if Felicia could get her booty off the internet, she might just write a little something today.

Games Felicia Plays

The Center for Alcohol and Other Drug Studies and Services at San Diego State University recently published the results of some research on parties: They found that drinking games cause people to drink more. Wow. Brilliant. Who knew? Felicia does not play games (except for the occasional rousing game of TV tag); Felicia takes drinking very seriously. Not that you won’t ever find a gaggle of girls at a table in Felicia’s alley mid-summer getting deliciously toasted while playing some drinking game involving spoons. It’s just that most of Felicia’s drinks are designed to be sipped slowly. Take, for example, the Dirty Girl martini. Chugging one of those is way too reminiscent of getting tumbled about in the surf and swallowing a big choking gulp of salty seawater as you almost lose your bathing suit. Sip, my friends. Savor the flavor. And speaking of martinis to savor, here’s the latest: the Fig Manhattan. A bold infusion of figs in Woodford Reserve bourbon, shaken lightly with a touch of tawny port. Slightly sweet and simply scrumptious. The Beet It Martini has been getting all of the attention lately as evidenced by all the patrons in the bar whose top lips are stained fuchsia. Can the Fig Manhattan compete? You’ll have to taste it and see for yourself.

The Cosmonaut

Tang: It’s not just for breakfast anymore! In the 1960’s, NASA astronauts supposedly used Tang during their space flights to cover up the stale flavor of the water. Felicia’s favorite Tang drink is a retro-modern take on the cosmopolitan, aptly named the Cosmonaut. As far as Felicia knows, the astronauts did not add any vodka to their Tang (talk about dangerous drinking and driving) but YOU can simultaneously get your kicks and 100% of your daily requirement of vitamin C.

The Cosmonaut

1 ½ ounce vodka
½ ounce triple sec
½ ounce Rose’s lime juice
1 tsp Tang powder
lime wedge or orange wedge

Shake all ingredients with ice. Strain into martini glass. Garnish with lime or orange wedge.

Welcome to 2008

Gheesh, Felicia is wiped out. All that holiday cheer takes a lot out of you. Haul that decoration crap back up into the attic for another season and make Felicia a drink while she puts her feet up by the fire. If Christmas and its cheesy decor never arrived again, Felicia would not miss it (for example, Jingles, the plush singing and dancing penguin. Seriously, he wouldn't be missed. At all). Now the important question is, what is Felicia going to drink? No, not bourbon, Felicia is reserving that for her bedtime nip. How about some Grey Goose orange on the rocks? Good stuff, my friends, good stuff. Hint for wimps: add tonic and a lime.

Grey Goose Orange on the Rocks

1 1/2 ounce Grey Goose Orange

Pour Goose over rocks. Sit your *ss down and put your feet up. Sip and enjoy.